-- la reverdereTuesday, March 13, 2012
Friday, March 9, 2012
Time To Consider That Perhaps There Is Good In This World
As of 2 weeks ago, Mirabella had never done the following things:
1. Smiled
2. Laughed
3. Worn a ribbon in her hair
4. Taken long naps sprawled upon a warm female body, so she could hear the heartbeat.
5. Eaten bits of banana.
6. Licked chocolate from a friend's finger.
7. Done sit-ups with a little help from a friend.
8. Been in a room with noisy playing kids.
9. Heard music.
10. Had a book read to her.
11. Been kissed vigorously on both fat cheeks.
12. Babbled for the first time.
13. Been loved.
14. Had someone cry at having to say goodbye to her.
-- la reverdere
1. Smiled
2. Laughed
3. Worn a ribbon in her hair
4. Taken long naps sprawled upon a warm female body, so she could hear the heartbeat.
5. Eaten bits of banana.
6. Licked chocolate from a friend's finger.
7. Done sit-ups with a little help from a friend.
8. Been in a room with noisy playing kids.
9. Heard music.
10. Had a book read to her.
11. Been kissed vigorously on both fat cheeks.
12. Babbled for the first time.
13. Been loved.
14. Had someone cry at having to say goodbye to her.
-- la reverdere
Is There Nothing Good In This World?
Those spoons that orphans use to eat your heart are soup spoons, not baby spoons. Andre, The Boy Who Learned That The World Is Not Such a Bad Place just unlearned that. Now he is The Boy Who Knows For Sure That The World Is a Bad Place. He was not sent to another institution to await a judge's determination as to his fate. He was sent home...back to the barn & cats & dogs as his roommates.
Today he was brought back to the hospital, running a fever, with a huge bruise on his forehead. A big man carried him in, wrapped in a rough blanket. Andre was dressed in ragged clothes & a pullover bandit-type wool hat & all his limbs were seized up with anxiety. At the sight of his face, we wrapped our arms around him & got teary-eyed, flooded with surprise & love at seeing him again. The man with the rough blanket waited while we stripped him naked, because the child welfare people wanted the clothes back. We petted him & talked to him & put him in clean clothes & fed him mush & some chocolate from our purses At moments, he relaxed to our voices & touches, but mostly he screamed & sobbed & kicked & beat his face with his fists. You can see the self-inflicted bruises. After an hour one two, he did smile in relief.
Schedules must be kept, so we had to leave him overnight. We have only one last day with him tomorrow, our last day of volunteering. What can love & tenderness do in one day??
Nothing...is that the real truth?...nothing.
-- la reverdere
Today he was brought back to the hospital, running a fever, with a huge bruise on his forehead. A big man carried him in, wrapped in a rough blanket. Andre was dressed in ragged clothes & a pullover bandit-type wool hat & all his limbs were seized up with anxiety. At the sight of his face, we wrapped our arms around him & got teary-eyed, flooded with surprise & love at seeing him again. The man with the rough blanket waited while we stripped him naked, because the child welfare people wanted the clothes back. We petted him & talked to him & put him in clean clothes & fed him mush & some chocolate from our purses At moments, he relaxed to our voices & touches, but mostly he screamed & sobbed & kicked & beat his face with his fists. You can see the self-inflicted bruises. After an hour one two, he did smile in relief.
Schedules must be kept, so we had to leave him overnight. We have only one last day with him tomorrow, our last day of volunteering. What can love & tenderness do in one day??
Nothing...is that the real truth?...nothing.
-- la reverdere
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Gabi Is The Biggest Girl Here
This is Gabi. She's 4 & has a twin sister. They are both developmentally disabled, but with different severities, so they have spent most of their lives apart, at different facilities. Occasionally the authorities send them home to their parents. Since they spend so much time apart, the girls don't know they are sisters. After a few weeks at their parents' house, things get overwhelming & their parents send them back to the institutions.
Gabi has very poor vision, so she "sees" with her mouth & nose. When she explores a toy or a person, she brushes her lips lightly over that thing or person & bumps her nose lightly against the surface & sniffs delicately. It's disarming to feel her soft skin & sweet breath against your face when she says hello.
She has to have a ball in her hands at all times to be happy. She's just now learning to walk with some confidence, with help from a friend. She's a patient, affectionate girl who loves to eat. At the hospital, they feed the kids a mush of bread & applesauce every day, for every meal. They don't get solid food on weekends -- just bottles of milk or chai tea. Volunteers bring in yogurt & cheese puffs & cheerios & other new & exotic foods. Gabi is the resident taste tester.
Gabi Strolling Down the Hall With Her BFF
-- la reverdere
Gabi has very poor vision, so she "sees" with her mouth & nose. When she explores a toy or a person, she brushes her lips lightly over that thing or person & bumps her nose lightly against the surface & sniffs delicately. It's disarming to feel her soft skin & sweet breath against your face when she says hello.
She has to have a ball in her hands at all times to be happy. She's just now learning to walk with some confidence, with help from a friend. She's a patient, affectionate girl who loves to eat. At the hospital, they feed the kids a mush of bread & applesauce every day, for every meal. They don't get solid food on weekends -- just bottles of milk or chai tea. Volunteers bring in yogurt & cheese puffs & cheerios & other new & exotic foods. Gabi is the resident taste tester.
Gabi Strolling Down the Hall With Her BFF
-- la reverdere
Baby Update
Mirabella Wonders Why
Io's Just Not Sure About Life
Little Mouse Is So Happy
Delia's Bandages Were Removed
-- la reverdere
Io's Just Not Sure About Life
Little Mouse Is So Happy
Delia's Bandages Were Removed
-- la reverdere
Monday, March 5, 2012
A Town Called Smoosh
Yesterday, on a road trip across the eastern Romanian mountains in beautiful, white-out snow conditions, we passed one of many small villages. Our driver pointed & said what sounded like "Smoosh." That town, sort-of called Smoosh, come to find out, is where Delia's parents live. Her birth 11 months ago hit the news pretty big...what with no arms & legs & being abandoned at the orphanage & all.
As Americans volunteering at the orphanage/hospital where Delia lives, we wanted to charge into Smoosh & commit violent acts against her parents. Of course, we didn't. We just drove on past Smoosh, & its not-so-secret shame vanished into the blurry snow-sky.
But how did her parents feel? The superstitions that led the villagers of Smoosh, from time immemorial, to believe that having a baby with birth defects results from evil in the mother's heart -- are those ancient beliefs too strong to break? Did that mother & father love their girl for even a moment?
Do they cry now? Drink? Live in grief & guilt? Smoosh is not so far from Barlad. Do they get news of her? Do they know that their daughter is named Delia? Do they know that, in this most imperfect world, Delia is loved & rocked & babbled to & kissed by strangers from far away? Do they know that that love & those kisses are transitory things, & that when you get right down to it, Delia sleeps alone, whipping her head from side-to-side to put herself to sleep, because no one else will?
Delia's torso isn't really square...this is her with rubbing alcohol-soaked towels packed under her clothes, making her bulky.
(Wait...maybe Delia's parents gave her up out of sheer economic necessity. If you have a disabled child & no money for a lifetime of doctors, nurses, or medicine...what do you do?)
-- la reverdere
As Americans volunteering at the orphanage/hospital where Delia lives, we wanted to charge into Smoosh & commit violent acts against her parents. Of course, we didn't. We just drove on past Smoosh, & its not-so-secret shame vanished into the blurry snow-sky.
But how did her parents feel? The superstitions that led the villagers of Smoosh, from time immemorial, to believe that having a baby with birth defects results from evil in the mother's heart -- are those ancient beliefs too strong to break? Did that mother & father love their girl for even a moment?
Do they cry now? Drink? Live in grief & guilt? Smoosh is not so far from Barlad. Do they get news of her? Do they know that their daughter is named Delia? Do they know that, in this most imperfect world, Delia is loved & rocked & babbled to & kissed by strangers from far away? Do they know that that love & those kisses are transitory things, & that when you get right down to it, Delia sleeps alone, whipping her head from side-to-side to put herself to sleep, because no one else will?
Delia's torso isn't really square...this is her with rubbing alcohol-soaked towels packed under her clothes, making her bulky.
(Wait...maybe Delia's parents gave her up out of sheer economic necessity. If you have a disabled child & no money for a lifetime of doctors, nurses, or medicine...what do you do?)
-- la reverdere
This Man Looks Kind of Gruff, But He Isn't
This is Vasilache Marin Dragos, Romanian artist. He makes his living selling his paintings across the street from a large cathedral. He's really tall, has a daughter living in New York & gives a good bear hug if you buy his work. He has a website: www.tablouri-comanda.ro.
One of his paintings, now headed for a new home in America.
-- la reverdere
One of his paintings, now headed for a new home in America.
-- la reverdere
Wow! Romanian Women Are Very Fierce Shoppers in Second-hand Stores
Striking cuff bracelet from second-hand store in Iasi, Romania -- 30 lei ($10)
-- la reverdere
-- la reverdere
Sunday, March 4, 2012
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Baby Update
Mirabella, the girl who loves to stare at her fingernails, had visitors. Her parents came, bearing flowers & religious icons, which they put near her crib.
We tried primal scream therapy with Io, the boy who can't be touched. This entailed swaddling him in a large blanket, holding & hugging him very tightly, & walking around & around in circles for an hour. He screamed bloody murder throughout. The nurses thought this enterprize extremely strange. Back in his crib afterwards, though, his body was more relaxed. The next day, he let a volunteer sit him on her lap for a few minutes. The day after that, he let a volunteer stroke his head gently for quite a while. And he hasn't been biting himself.
Christian Andre, the boy who began to discover that the world is not all bad, is gone. The authorities moved him to a children's disabled center to await a judicial hearing to determine whether he will return to his parents (a.k.a., live in a shed with the cats & dogs). At the disabled center, he will lie in a crib all day with little stimulation. He surely will not receive foot massages & fresh oranges slices, as he has with us.
They removed the IV from Delia's scalp & put it in her foot. Is that progress? Don't know.
-- la reverdere
We tried primal scream therapy with Io, the boy who can't be touched. This entailed swaddling him in a large blanket, holding & hugging him very tightly, & walking around & around in circles for an hour. He screamed bloody murder throughout. The nurses thought this enterprize extremely strange. Back in his crib afterwards, though, his body was more relaxed. The next day, he let a volunteer sit him on her lap for a few minutes. The day after that, he let a volunteer stroke his head gently for quite a while. And he hasn't been biting himself.
Christian Andre, the boy who began to discover that the world is not all bad, is gone. The authorities moved him to a children's disabled center to await a judicial hearing to determine whether he will return to his parents (a.k.a., live in a shed with the cats & dogs). At the disabled center, he will lie in a crib all day with little stimulation. He surely will not receive foot massages & fresh oranges slices, as he has with us.
They removed the IV from Delia's scalp & put it in her foot. Is that progress? Don't know.
-- la reverdere
Painted Monasteries Are Not What They Seem
From afar, the pictures painted on the exterior & interior of Romania's Painted Monasteries around 1415 look like orderly processions of saints, but up close there are a lot of beheadings going on.
-- la reverdere
-- la reverdere
Friday, March 2, 2012
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